Sex and the City: The Abridged Script
By: Rod Hilton on Jun 1st, 2008 | Movie Rating: 
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"Ha ha, you're right - Arrested Development WAS hilarious! How did we get a movie?"
FADE IN:
EXT. NEW YORK CITY
SARAH JESSICA PARKER, CYNTHIA NIXON, KRISTIN DAVIS, and KIM CATTRALL talk unabashedly about SEX and obsess brainlessly over FASHION.
SARAH JESSICA PARKER
Female empowerment is great!
CYNTHIA NIXON
Yeah! Grrl power!
They illustrate this by having the men in their lives do unforgivable things to them, then eventually blame themselves and forgive the men. This allows them to live HAPPILY EVER AFTER.
END
I’ve never watched a full episode of Sex and the City, but I feel like I get the point from just seeing random clips and screenshots. Likewise, Rod’s script is the appropriate length and probably has the same amount of content in it as the actual script for this movie.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but it seems all Carrie does is obsess over men and fashion (which she then proceeds to write about when she’s at home). Does she ever do anything interesting enough to justify her enormous popularity?
June 3rd, 2008 at 11:50 amThought it was about time I posted here, having been a reader for at least 8 years. Firstly, good work Rod, keep it up! Don’t let the whiners get you down. Perhaps you can confound them by changing the ‘Coming Soon’ box to a link to a list of every film ever on IMDB.
Secondly, trivia: it transpired that the dress Sarah Jessica Parker wore to the premiere had been worn before at similarly momentous events. She described this as “unethical” behaviour by the designers.
P.S. Sean C, don’t be sad, there is an AD movie coming, no? It seems to be gaining momentum.
June 4th, 2008 at 5:47 amBack when the show was still considered ‘new’ and ‘edgy’ I rented season one on video to see what the fuss was about. I was young enough at the time to mostly consider the ‘gimmick’ of women candidly talking about sex on TV to be entertaining enough to overlook the bad writing, bad acting, bad Everyting… until near the end of that season it delivered this little gem of a line…
“You’re breaking up with me, while you’re still Inside me?”
Haven’t touched the franchise since.
June 12th, 2008 at 12:37 pmHeh, very nice job on this script. That’s about the gist of it! Nicely done as always!
Personally, I want you to do a script for The Great Train Robbery (1915), then work your way to present time. Heh.
June 12th, 2008 at 12:51 pm[...] latest additions: - Iron Man - Sex and the City - [...]
June 23rd, 2008 at 12:31 pmI’m not saying that this site is an exclusive boys club. However I will bet that none Rods female fans would see themselves as “girly-girls” -the target audience for chick flicks.
They might also dislike the film but the reasons will be less logical and clinical. This abridged script is exactly the right length for Rod’s audience.
You may or may not be dragged to another chick flick in you life Rod, but abridging it would be redundant. The one above covers the lot.
As for as the original TV show, it was made for a certain kind of woman and they liked it. A LOT. I can live with that. There are enough crappy action blockbusters aimed at you and me to get worked up about.
June 27th, 2008 at 11:23 amYou people are WAY too hard on poor Sarah Jessica Parker! I mean, just LOOK at the caption photo! All four of those women are hags! None would be worthy of a boot out of bed mind you, but be sure to go to HER place so you can sneak out afterwards with out waking her!
Someday I may actually watch an episode of Sex in the City. Or, on second though, probably not. When ever it came on was a signal for me to grab the remote and find something else :)
July 10th, 2008 at 8:38 amHello. I think you are eactly thinking like Sukrat. I really loved the post.
July 18th, 2008 at 7:37 pmi think it’s just good entertainment
August 2nd, 2008 at 1:06 pmand if you went to that movie with your girlfriend
you showed her that she really loves you
like she does when she went to actionmovies with you
i’m probably in the target audience (young woman). but the fact that the whole movie had less actual content then Rod’s piece kind of trew me off.
August 16th, 2008 at 5:13 pmsame with the serie. replacing story-depth with sex might work for some people but it doesn’t interest me. if i want to see hours of sluts getting it on with one guy after another i’d go to the ‘adult section’ of the local video store and spare myself some moronic dialogue sequences.