Comments on: Star Trek: Insurrection http://www.the-editing-room.com/startrek9.html Abridged Scripts for Movies Tue, 07 Feb 2012 14:45:00 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.2.1 By: Carlhttp://www.the-editing-room.com/startrek9.html#comment-116134 Carl Sat, 10 Dec 2011 08:05:00 +0000 http://localhost/wordpress/?p=230#comment-116134 Did YOU see the movie? This lampooned it wonderfully - not that that takes much doing, it's one of the most laughable and yet truly horrific things to happen to Star Trek after The Final Frontier, Nemesis and Enterprise seasons 1-3. And I say that as someone who has been a die-hard Trek fan since I was 5 years old (I'm now over 30, I've been through every Star Trek except TOS as it aired).I watched this at the cinema and nearly cried as I left, it was that awful. They raped Star Trek, was all I could think. T.E.R missed a golden opportunity with Riker and his Amiga Joyriding Joystick of Jaw-Dropping Awfulness, though. And Data acting like a 5 year old. And the starship shaped like a remote control. And the androids bottom jokes (how I wanted to bleach my brain after that). Or the blatant "plastic surgery is bad kids, bad bad baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. Look how bad it is, see this guy? This guy is why plastic surgery is BAD" message that was hammered into the audience with all the subtlety of a Dick Van Dyke "cockney" accent... All in all, an awful film lampooned wonderfully. These abridged scripts aren't about being accurate, they are about having a laugh at the absurdities present in EVERY movie. Insurrection just happened to have a lot of them. Did YOU see the movie? This lampooned it wonderfully - not that that takes much doing, it's one of the most laughable and yet truly horrific things to happen to Star Trek after The Final Frontier, Nemesis and Enterprise seasons 1-3. And I say that as someone who has been a die-hard Trek fan since I was 5 years old (I'm now over 30, I've been through every Star Trek except TOS as it aired).

I watched this at the cinema and nearly cried as I left, it was that awful. They raped Star Trek, was all I could think. T.E.R missed a golden opportunity with Riker and his Amiga Joyriding Joystick of Jaw-Dropping Awfulness, though. And Data acting like a 5 year old. And the starship shaped like a remote control. And the androids bottom jokes (how I wanted to bleach my brain after that). Or the blatant "plastic surgery is bad kids, bad bad baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. Look how bad it is, see this guy? This guy is why plastic surgery is BAD" message that was hammered into the audience with all the subtlety of a Dick Van Dyke "cockney" accent... 

All in all, an awful film lampooned wonderfully. These abridged scripts aren't about being accurate, they are about having a laugh at the absurdities present in EVERY movie. Insurrection just happened to have a lot of them.

]]> By: Anonymoushttp://www.the-editing-room.com/startrek9.html#comment-113319 Anonymous Sat, 09 Jul 2011 04:09:00 +0000 http://localhost/wordpress/?p=230#comment-113319 Um...did you actually SEE the movie? I get that it's "abridged", but I thought that meant sarcastically pointing out stupid stuff and putting in a few jokes here and there. It was so far removed from what actually happened in the movie that I wasn't amused at all. No stars. Didn't like. Also, I LIKE Insurrection. I thought it was the best Star Trek movie besides the whale one. Um...did you actually SEE the movie? I get that it's "abridged", but I thought that meant sarcastically pointing out stupid stuff and putting in a few jokes here and there. It was so far removed from what actually happened in the movie that I wasn't amused at all. No stars. Didn't like.
Also, I LIKE Insurrection. I thought it was the best Star Trek movie besides the whale one.

]]> By: Hold up Nemesishttp://www.the-editing-room.com/startrek9.html#comment-57405 Hold up Nemesis Wed, 11 Nov 2009 02:50:59 +0000 http://localhost/wordpress/?p=230#comment-57405 Have you seen TNG from start to finish? Picard, has always given up being admiral. He's had at least 2 offers and turned them down. Being a captain is where you make the difference. Being on the front line bettering humanity and the galaxy. As for Data dying, there's always a way to get him back (Remember the download to B4, what if B4 wakes up one day as Data. Essentially cheating death.) Getting Riker and Troi back is as easy as a collaborative effort of the two ships in formation. (Really why the hell not have the enterprise and another ship fly together in a joint mission) I never got why they always had to fly solo for the feature films esp if there's a competition between Picard and Riker to out captain each other. And for the logistics of Nemesis plot, the war between inheritance and choices deciding fate is a lesson in humanity I still debate. Have you seen TNG from start to finish? Picard, has always given up being admiral. He's had at least 2 offers and turned them down. Being a captain is where you make the difference. Being on the front line bettering humanity and the galaxy. As for Data dying, there's always a way to get him back (Remember the download to B4, what if B4 wakes up one day as Data. Essentially cheating death.) Getting Riker and Troi back is as easy as a collaborative effort of the two ships in formation. (Really why the hell not have the enterprise and another ship fly together in a joint mission) I never got why they always had to fly solo for the feature films esp if there's a competition between Picard and Riker to out captain each other. And for the logistics of Nemesis plot, the war between inheritance and choices deciding fate is a lesson in humanity I still debate.

]]> By: Moronihttp://www.the-editing-room.com/startrek9.html#comment-49715 Moroni Mon, 01 Jun 2009 22:05:12 +0000 http://localhost/wordpress/?p=230#comment-49715 The best part of this movie in my opinion was Riker piloting the Enterprise with a joystick. That was funny. :) The best part of this movie in my opinion was Riker piloting the Enterprise with a joystick. That was funny. :)

]]> By: Invader Gabehttp://www.the-editing-room.com/startrek9.html#comment-33881 Invader Gabe Sun, 21 Dec 2008 01:02:19 +0000 http://localhost/wordpress/?p=230#comment-33881 I don't want to get into a nerdy discussion, but if you adhere to the series internal logic, Janeway did manage to kill the FUCKING BORG, or at least HURT THEM SOMEHOW... A LITTLE. On the other hand, Picard disobeyed orders and tried to score an alien chick, and had the indecency of doing so while NOT BEING FUCKING KIRK. Ergo: Janeway gets to be an admiral and appear on conventions, Picard stays as a captain. And Professor X. And Ahab from Moby Dick, maybe. I don't want to get into a nerdy discussion, but if you adhere to the series internal logic, Janeway did manage to kill the FUCKING BORG, or at least HURT THEM SOMEHOW... A LITTLE. On the other hand, Picard disobeyed orders and tried to score an alien chick, and had the indecency of doing so while NOT BEING FUCKING KIRK. Ergo: Janeway gets to be an admiral and appear on conventions, Picard stays as a captain. And Professor X. And Ahab from Moby Dick, maybe.

]]> By: Aces Highhttp://www.the-editing-room.com/startrek9.html#comment-29131 Aces High Thu, 02 Oct 2008 05:24:21 +0000 http://localhost/wordpress/?p=230#comment-29131 Yeah after they did First Contact, Star Trek went down hill, so don't bother seeing Nemesis anyone, because Janeway somehow becomes Admiral over Picard, even though she was lost in the Delta Quadrant for like 12 fucking years but Picard kept doing his duty instead and got shafted. Someone tell me how that fucking works in the real world, also Data sacrifices himself to kill the bad guy and his huge ass ship and Riker marries Troi and he gets promoted and moves ships leaving the Enterprise totally destitute of all the cool characters outside Worf, Picard and LaForge from the Next Generation series so you don't need to see that shitty movie anymore. Yeah after they did First Contact, Star Trek went down hill, so don't bother seeing Nemesis anyone, because Janeway somehow becomes Admiral over Picard, even though she was lost in the Delta Quadrant for like 12 fucking years but Picard kept doing his duty instead and got shafted. Someone tell me how that fucking works in the real world, also Data sacrifices himself to kill the bad guy and his huge ass ship and Riker marries Troi and he gets promoted and moves ships leaving the Enterprise totally destitute of all the cool characters outside Worf, Picard and LaForge from the Next Generation series so you don't need to see that shitty movie anymore.

]]> By: XdudeXhttp://www.the-editing-room.com/startrek9.html#comment-12296 XdudeX Sun, 24 Feb 2008 07:30:03 +0000 http://localhost/wordpress/?p=230#comment-12296 This movie sounds far beyond stupid and pointless. This movie sounds far beyond stupid and pointless.

]]> By: Ryan Ferneauhttp://www.the-editing-room.com/startrek9.html#comment-148 Ryan Ferneau Sat, 30 Jun 2007 06:01:48 +0000 http://localhost/wordpress/?p=230#comment-148 Wow, that movie was way sillier than I remember it. Wow, that movie was way sillier than I remember it.

]]>