Sex and the City: The Abridged Script
By: Rod Hilton on Jun 1st, 2008 | Movie Rating: 
"Ha ha, you're right - Arrested Development WAS hilarious! How did we get a movie?"
FADE IN:
EXT. NEW YORK CITY
SARAH JESSICA PARKER, CYNTHIA NIXON, KRISTIN DAVIS, and KIM CATTRALL talk unabashedly about SEX and obsess brainlessly over FASHION.
SARAH JESSICA PARKER
Female empowerment is great!
CYNTHIA NIXON
Yeah! Grrl power!
They illustrate this by having the men in their lives do unforgivable things to them, then eventually blame themselves and forgive the men. This allows them to live HAPPILY EVER AFTER.
END
I guess you enjoyed the movie then? Haha.
It takes a certain kind of genius to make a script with 2 lines in it actually be funny. That kind is known as ‘ROD HILTON’.
June 1st, 2008 at 11:28 amThat picture caption makes me incredibly sad. WAY TO GO
June 1st, 2008 at 11:51 amso this is the “appointed” one? still looking for your take on Cloverfield, Harry Potter and Indiana Jones…
June 1st, 2008 at 11:56 amI’ve never understood the whole, “I’m an empowered woman who shows her independence by screwing every single man who so much as glances at her in a bar.” Yet women who choose abstinence are “ignorant and not independent because they follow someone else’s rules.” Being in control of yourself and your sexuality makes you independent, even if that means that occasionally you choose NOT to have sex with some horny moron.
I also blame sex and the city for the recent slew of shows that use the word “Sex” every 5 seconds in hopes that women will watch. “Hey, ladies! I just had sex! My husband and I have bad sex! I had an affair with someone, and we had sex! I like to use whipped cream when having sex! Watch this show! Do you identify with me yet?” The shows feature women doing things that have nothing to do with sex, such as standing in line at the grocery store, gardening, and writing a dissertation, and all they can talk about is sex. Hey, I wonder which gender writes these shows.
The saddest thing about it of course is that it works. It’s like the whole “FREEDOM” thing in the 300 movie. “FREEDOM” attracts all the fanboys, “SEX” attracts all the woman who think that “sex = independence!”
June 1st, 2008 at 12:07 pm