The Very Abridged Script
INT. SOME RESTAURANT
JACK BLACK accidentally touches KATE WINSLET'S BOOB.
Ooops! I just touched your boob!
You did! That is so god-damned funny!
We should put that moment in every single advertisement!
That way, it'll look like it's the only joke in the entire fucking movie!
CAMERON also has trouble walking on ice in high heels and she drinks wine straight from the bottle excitedly!