The Holiday: The Abridged Script

Holiday

“That’s the best impression of an extremely dangerous pedophile I’ve ever seen!”

FADE IN:

INT. SOME RESTAURANT

JACK BLACK accidentally touches KATE WINSLET’S BOOB.

JACK BLACK

Ooops! I just touched your boob!

KATE WINSLET

You did! That is so god-damned funny!

JUDE LAW

We should put that moment in every single advertisement!

CAMERON DIAZ

That way, it’ll look like it’s the only joke in the entire fucking movie!

CAMERON also has trouble walking on ice in high heels and she drinks wine straight from the bottle excitedly!

END

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13 Responses to “The Holiday: The Abridged Script”

  1. 1
    Sean C Says:

    I have the strangest feeling that you never actually watched this…

  2. 2
    Alexandru Duta Says:

    Could’ve done more with this.

  3. 3
    anonymous Says:

    nah, i saw that movie. that’s pretty much the gist of it. although he could’ve done more.

  4. 4
    packersoccer05 Says:

    ickk. This movie is good and you messed it up! You coulda done A LOT more with this…a lot! You stink at this!

  5. 5
    Arthur Says:

    Actually, even that wasn’t funny. Sickeningly cutesy sweet, no bite to it whatsoever.

  6. 6
    Nick Sanford Says:

    I actually thought this script was funny. Sometimes his short ones can have just as much impact.

  7. 7
    Tina Says:

    i am not sure what this is… is there somewhere where the WHOLE script is? I desperately want the first 20 minutes of the movie!
    VERY good movie!!!

  8. 8
    Ray Says:

    a full script maybe perfect

  9. 9
    AJ Says:

    Shorter scripts can be just as effective as longer scripts, and even more fun, especially when Rod doesn’t feel like the movie is worth the effort or is just lazy. See scripts for 8 Mile and Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels for more examples.

  10. 10
    Anonymous #2 Says:

    I saw the movie and it was terrible! That was pretty much the whole movie. it wasn’t worth a whole script, or actually watching it!!

  11. 11
    Lana Says:

    Methinks you may be a bit of a weenie. I’d like to hear just what you would expect to see in a light romantic comedy: Zombies maybe? A flesh-eating virus in our water source? Homeless war veterans? Limbless children? Pfffft. Mr. Napkinhead was priceless.

  12. 12
    Nicky Says:

    Have you actually seen the movie? I thought it was great. And what you wrote here? STUPID, man.

  13. 13
    I love me some Matt Damon/Leo Says:

    that was weak. c’mon- you could do better. this was actually a cute movie

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